G’day folks it’s amazing how communication though it has never been more available and more high tech sadly is a dying art, people walk side by side and text someone else while talking but not looking, and walking but not paying attention.
When you meet someone new you tell them about yourself, what you like, what you don’t and it’s the same for we the dis and otherwise abled, no it’s not the same it’s much more important , I as my regular readers now live with multiple disabilities spinal cord injury, arthritis, epilepsy, neuro spasticity, propio spinal myoclonus, PTSD, neuropathy and so much more.
Now if you knew Me prior to the litany of diagnosis that reads like greys anatomy you would know I am punctual, I am industrious, I am entrepreneurial creative and live by a credo “why do one thing with mediocrity when you can excel at 6 things simultaneously, as a child I was diagnosed as having the worst case off ADDHD the hospital had ever seen as well as being a language savant and an above average IQ and an eidetic memory.
Now we come to combining the pre diagnosis persona with the post and you get me! And that is a person who on her good days is ten minutes early, and is someone who listens intently, and with my memory will remember every word you say what you were wearing and what your looked like 25 years from now. But what you have to realize with a disabled person is with all the good intentions the non- disabled part of me laid out my clothes the night before researched the topic made cheat notes memorized them and went to bed early but then 4 epileptic seizures and 5 hours of limb spasms later you get a call cancelling not because I’m flaky or unreliable but because that is part of the deal when you have a friend with multiple disabilities.
The other night I was face timing with the amazing Annabelle planning an upcoming two day writing workshop for a radio project and literally half way through speaking my I-phone flew right ,my laptop flew left the service dog flew into action and I went into a grand mal seizure all while she watched me shake on face-time she who must be obeyed having seen this a thousand times caught the laptop with one hand the I-phone with the other while giving commands to the service- dog and telling Annabelle I would call back later.
The point of all this folks is whether you meet someone when they’re already disabled or you knew them before and was there through the change, there is a conversation and a pact that has to be made and it goes like this
“I WILL NEVER KNOWINGLY LET YOU DOWN OR BLOW YOU OFF AND OR JUST NOT SHOW UP WHEN YOU’RE RELYING ON ME”
“BUT THE OTHER BEING INSIDE ME THAT IS MY DISABILITY MAY HAVE SOMETHING TO SAY ABOUT ME KEEPING THAT VOW, IT WILL ARRIVE WITHOUT INVITATION ACT UP WITHOUT NOTICE, AND ALWAYS OUTSTAY IT’S WELCOME”
That being said being my friend is kind of like that old saying “love me love my dog”
In closing your part of the deal is to decide can you be in a friendship or business arrangement that despite the best made plans of mice and men will from time to time be put on hold and it’s no one’s fault?. If you can’t may the road always rise up to meet you and may the sun always be at your back and may you be in heaven a half hour before the devil knows your dead, it won’t be easy hanging in there but if you do the ride will be wonderful.