A note to partners of the home bound disabled

I know that once one of a married couple end up paraplegic or quadriplegic or amputee or MS or just any permanent disability that keeps them at home even if just temporarily, while the other partner goes to work please remember we don’t stop caring.
We don’t stop wanting to protect you, so when you call home for a chat maybe it might be a good idea not to tell the spouse at home a car almost ran you over or a homeless person in Manhattan tried to grab you, because we still have the natural urge to jump through the phone and be there to make the boogie man go away.
I understand that you are a capable strong professional who was handling the stress and animal kingdom that is Manhattan long before I was ever on the scene but part of being a couple is the natural urge to hold you when it hurts, to keep the assholes from harassing you when you look great in a outfit.
When the phone rings and you’re sobbing and I am eight miles away in a different borough I hurt too, I am not saying don’t share and I know I was the first person you thought to tell. But I am still shaking I want to find the monster and put him down and here I am in a wheelchair an hour away.
I still remember September 11th when you rang to say planes had hit a building not far from you and you were trying to find your sister to walk home and we turned on the tv and saw the towers fall and the millions covered in soot and you were somewhere amongst them it was over 7 hours before I knew you were ok. I never want that feeling again the highlight of my day is when you kiss me goodbye and when you kiss me again when walk through the door.
My case today was scary, when Ella rang and I couldn’t control my fear and anger but I remember if it happens to me it happens to others, and if they feel one iota of the worry and the stress and pain then I want the other partners out there to know when you come home hug them and tell them once they can see you’re safe and sound because for every tear you cry we the ones at home cry two more.
We love you, and we want to keep the vampires from the door and the creeps away from you forever, and it just hurts when we find out that something happened and we were not there to do our job.

Author: disabledaccessdenied

I am a disabled woman who through no fault of my own has wheels under my ass. I rely on the decency and common sense of local, state and federal goverments, as well as the retail community to abide by the disabled access laws and provide adequate ramps, disabled toilets, and not use them as store rooms or broom closets. This blog exists to find the offenders and out them, inform them, and report them if necessary and shame them into doing the right thing when all else fails.

1 thought on “A note to partners of the home bound disabled”

  1. I want nothing more that to keep YOU safe and well and happy. I do not know how to function without constantly wanting to shield you from frustration and from issues. That is who I am. I know today scared you and for that I apologize. Trust me when I tell you more often than not I just want to keep life simple and do it all myself because I feel like you have enough on your plate. THAT is exactly why I say let me deal with the building and with the doctors and with all of these things, not because I can’t use the help,I can. Not because I want to take control away from you. Not because I don’t think you are capable but because I want to try my best to keep life positive and simple. So let me do that as much as I can.

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