I’m sorry for calling you sir, sir? Or the tale of a homophobic trans-phobic barely literate office staff

Recently my spouse had to change medical insurance, because her magazine owner went for a lower cost work place medical cover for the employees. It created all kinds of problems because our old medical group no longer could treat us since they didn’t accept the new HMO.

We searched for a few weeks and finally found Dr. Morgan of the Manhattan Physicians Group, so we went for the first appointment. The first mistake was the co-pay. The co-pay amount was printed in plastic as $20, yet they insisted it was $40. We questioned why the increase. I, as a transgender woman, was trying to talk to an elderly Latino woman with a extremely thick accent. I was there sitting in front of them with my hair in two braids, wearing a push up sports bra and exercise tights, a full face of make-up and cleavage showing yet the woman called me sir.

I said no, I’m not a senor, Im a senora. She said in a thick accent “What” and tilted her head. “You is a man?” “No,” I said “I’m a woman.” “No, you is a man” she argued. I responded by saying that my name was “Miarosa and I am a female.” “Why you want to call yourself woman,” I was asked. I was so obviously angry and disgusted that an obviously gay man came running and sprouting “on behalf of the practice I would like to apologize for her comments. It is not the belief of the practice that you are male.”

So we finally go into see the doctor and she is wonderful, and as were leaving were called to the desk and a very large African American man called us over and started telling us that it was forty dollars not twenty even though pressed into the plastic medical card clearly is $20, even though this was already dealt with. He then started calling me sir and he was the practice manager.

So in disgust I let Ella handle them. He also told us we needed referrals to see the specialists and they would contact us in the next two days regarding referrals.

This morning at about 11am the phone rang I answered “hello Mia Vayner, who is calling?” The voice on the other end spoke, “yo I need your wife.” “You want Ella,” I asked. The reply was in such a tone I thought I was being punked. The voice spoke in eubonics on a business call. “No I is need to speak to Miarosa.” (She horribly mispronounced my name in a thick eubonic sounding accent.) “I am Miarosa, how may I help you,” I stated again. “Listen dude, you wanna play girly dats fine but I is busy so put miarosa on.” “We’re lesbians,” I told her “and I am Miarosa. My wife is Ella.” “Don’t bullshit me, you is a sir and I don’t need no sir I needs your wife,” they continued. Again I said “I am Miarosa, how may I help you?” “Youss can help me by not playing girl or I will hang up” and the phone went dead.

I called the practice and the secretary called me sir five times, (a different secretary so now two secretaries and a practice manager and a referrals officer all homophobic). So she put me through to another manager and he told me “If it did happen and I doubt it, I am sorry they called you sir sir.” So we now know where it comes from.

It’s the 21st century, how hard is to be respectful of someones gender identity or sexual preference? How hard is it to simply be respectful to everyone? How hard? You simply see someone in front of your desk presenting as a woman with a woman’s body and say “yes ma’am” it’s not rocket science.

Perhaps Manhattan Physicians Group can stop employing from gangbangers are-us and set a minimum standard that people paid to interface with clients have a basic grasp of the English language.

Speaking eubonics doesn’t make you bi-lingual it makes you lazy. And your anger because I refuse to recognize “aightt” as anything more than the guttural growl it is could have been better expelled learning English and manners. The shocking part is you were born here to American parents so the usage of eubonics doesn’t make you cool it makes you sad.

Author: disabledaccessdenied

I am a disabled woman who through no fault of my own has wheels under my ass. I rely on the decency and common sense of local, state and federal goverments, as well as the retail community to abide by the disabled access laws and provide adequate ramps, disabled toilets, and not use them as store rooms or broom closets. This blog exists to find the offenders and out them, inform them, and report them if necessary and shame them into doing the right thing when all else fails.

One thought on “I’m sorry for calling you sir, sir? Or the tale of a homophobic trans-phobic barely literate office staff”

  1. I agree whole heartedly, I sometimes go thru the same thing, I am post op m2f for the past 40 years and look and dress ONLY as a female. I have been asked to be married by at least 4 MEN. They didn’t know, nor needed to know.
    Now, at 60 years old, I just tell they to “fuck off,’ It works at times, most of the time I tell them they are more than wrong.

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